The Gris Gris Man’s Christmas Spell On The Atlanta Falcons


On the Winter Solstice I brewed this magic potion,
When night was full of spirits I set this spell in motion,
I called on Papa Legba to lend me his special power,
So now with moon all full I cry out at the midnight hour,
Oh Ms Marie come stir my pot and into it your magic put,
Some powerful gris gris medicine and toenails from your foot,
I brought some eyes I dug up deep from a swampy grave,
And into the pot I also put some monkey’s hair I shaved,
Now in goes a 6ft rat snake who on bird eggs he did survive,
It’s creatures of the sky we duel and these birds are flying high,
They are some black and Dirty Birds this we all know is true,
On Monday Night I cast this spell to bust dem where dey flew,
From up way high with broken wings dey will come crashing down,
Da Saints from old New Orleans are marching in to town,
I already done laid some ground work all around their patron saint,
Old MLK and da GGM dey got together and had a lot to drink,
I got dat whole town Atlanta covered with my magic goo,
Den I even snucked in their locker room and rubbed some on der shoes,
I put some itching powder in each der each and every jock,
Now when they try to run I done put me some rocks up in their socks,
I added some smashed up lizard tails and skulls from ‘ol dead crows,
The smell is mighty awful but not as bad as a buzzards toes,
Next I even added me some feathers from a decaying duck,
There is not a bird on earth this spell it won’t mess up,
Now when da game is over I will let them pigeons fly again,
But them poor old Atlanta Falcons will see the beginning of the end,
We’ll mess up all their plans to do what we done did,
Dey fun will now be over and now dey on da skids,
Sorry I got to bust you birds so hard up in da mouth,
And mercy I cannot show you even though u from da South,
It’s time our Saints remind you what we do on Monday Night,
We cook some Dirty Birds and we serve you with red beans and rice!

Gris Gris Man, Voodoo Surgeon General and King of the Zombies

Any and all Spells & hexes are performed specifically for the sole purpose of generating an “L” for the opposing team! This includes but is not limited to, fumbles, penalties, in completions, pick 6’s, missed field goals, strips, trips, bungles, gaffs, brain farts, Come on Man’s, or otherwise benign occurrences.

PETA DISCLAIMER: No curses were used and no animals were hurt too bad or killed excessively in the making and or casting of this spell!

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